Cloverfield

All these jokes to cover my insecurity
Stopping myself from any maturity
Afraid to grow up, afraid of any change
Afraid to mix it up and rearrange
Out my mouth comes all these daggers
Leaving those around wounded and staggered
Cutting my inner mouth before exit
I just wish these words would never exist
I don’t know why I say them
As if I had a broken brain stem
My nerves saying stop, but they dont get the message
And the painful lines just keep on pressin’
But I am just a verbal bully
The reason why I will never know fully
I guess it started off as jokes
Then led to some pokes
Soon enough turned to slaps
Making sure they’d all collapse
Next my fist tighened
And I can’t help but be a little frightened
Just hoping that it would all be over and yeild
Cuz it’s starting to feel a bit like cloverfield
This unknown monster destroying me
And destroying all that I could ever be
Eaten me from the inside
Like my inner evil and good just collide
So I’m begging for this to stop
For this persona to drop
But this will only happen if I make it
This is my habit, and I must break it
So if I must cut of my tongue then I will
Because this cloverfield I no longer want to feel